Holy Spirit, Gift of God

Dear you...

I'm rather aware I'm called to be different. I'm not always gonna have my family and friends around.
I grew up in a big church, with all my closest friends. God took me out of that when I was 16...moved me into a small church where I only knew 1 or 2.













I grew up in a family of 4, a close family. God moved me to another home for 3 months where I didn't know anyone.














He took me to Spain to live with a family for 10 days. Again, I knew no-one.
God took me to Portugal for 2 weeks. I went with 1 person I knew really well.
He put me into a good group of school friends. I was the only Christian.
God is taking me 5 hours away from my family and friends and 1 hour away from my boyfriend for 3 years.

I think I'm called to be different, independant, in love with God and to be taken places.
I don't want to move away from the ones I love, I never have.

I do want God's plan. No matter how heartbreakingly painful it is, I know he sees my path and will take me the best route. All the times I have been seperated, cut off, left, moved around, plonkey down...I can see God's hand over it. And I never could've learnt it all if that hadn't happened.

So this is a tearful message to all my family and friends who I never seen, speak to or am not as close to as before.
I'm sorry I haven't made the decisions you wanted me to make.
I'm sorry for loosing you.
I'm sorry for not being close.

I'm not sorry for doing what I felt God was calling me to do.

I truely think about you and pray for you.

Lots of love

Me
x

posted by MissHarwood @ 00:39 0 Comments

I heart blogging

I've spent the last hour, I guess you could call it Re-discovering myself, by reading all the old posts in my blog.
Some things I'd totally cringe at and want to delete, others I'd be proud of.

I think it's important to read old stuff you've written. Someone once told me not to throw away an old journal of mine because it's important. I listened and am glad I did.

My blog has always been my creativity getaway and I've always enjoyed it. Other than writing, I'm not creative. I always wish I could paint and have a room like Allie in The Notebook. But, I'm alright with just being able to write.

I also looked at the comments. Brings back a lot of memories. I think from reading everything tonigh, God has shown me something which I need to change. Writing is something I enjoy, and I'm also an open, honest and blunt person. So my blog worked well for me.

I was never forcing people to read it. Things I wrote, of course, resulted in all different kinds of comments. I never found out who each anon was but that doesn't matter so it's okay.
But I think a part of me got torn apaert in those comments and I guess I've always been feeling the consequence ever since. It's amazing how our words can change people view of themselves, people's behaviour and people's personality.
I think maybe thats why theres always been gaps between my blogging.

So this is what Gods showing.

To hold my heart out once again to reach people all over the world.


Just as I wrote the full stop of that sentence, Brooke Fraser sang down my headphones I'm holding my heart out to you.

Wow.

I think God wants me to come back to blogging.

posted by MissHarwood @ 00:21 0 Comments